9/11

Yesterday morning was a bit rough. While life insisted on taking priority, and life must go on, I spent some time reflecting on my Nation's tragedy, and I can't believe that it's been 11 years since the Attacks. 

When I was in my teens, I remember asking my grandmother, my mom's mom, where she was, what she was doing, how she felt when she heard about the bombing of Pearl Harbor. I was dumbfounded when she said that she didn't really remember everything - that what struck her the most about that night was that the cow had gotten out and put her head in their window. What?! I tried to get her to talk about her feelings - what went through her mind when she heard? That kind of thing. I don't remember all of the details, but I do remember thinking that this woman could not possibly be truly human if such an occurrence happened and it didn't cement itself to her mind and heart.

Unbelievably, America was attacked in my lifetime. It's not something that I ever thought would happen.  I don't think anyone thought it would happen again - ever. But it did. So, on September 11, 2001, I was in Lucerne Valley with my ex-husband and two little babies. Taylor was almost 2 and Mandy was only 5 months old. I was getting the girls' their breakfast while they were watching Clifford on PBS. I received a phone call from a friend, and considering it was so early, I figured something was wrong. She told me to turn on the news, and she was screaming that the World Trade Center was gone. I thought she was losing her mind, and I made a joke, "What? Like a David Copperfield kind of gone or what?" She then got pissed at me and screamed to turn on the news.  She hung up on me, and so I went to change the channel. What I saw was so horrific, and I just sat down on the floor and stared at the television.

Just as I turned to the news, the second plane was going into the other Tower. What the hell was going on?? At that point, no one knew what was happening. For hours, I watched the towers burn, people jumping from the windows, and then the Towers fell. I remember grabbing both of my daughters and just holding them. I didn't want to let go.  How could this happen? Why was this happening? Who would do this or was it some horrible accident??

By the end of the day, I was an emotional wreck. My ex-husband had refused to wake up and felt it wasn't important, so I had endured the day relatively by myself. I learned about the attack at the Pentagon and the plane that went down in the field. I suddenly learned about Al-Quaida. I had never heard of that group before; the only thing I had learned about was Islam and while I wasn't a fan, the Koran spoke of love and peace. What did America do to these people that they plotted and terrorized us like this?

Over the years, I have learned more - more about the people who caused this devastation, my Country's input on ignoring the warning signs, etc. There will always be the conspiracy theorists and those who speak of just moving on and not hating those that caused the damage.

Personally, I have never trusted anyone or any religion who not only insists that their religion is the only path to heaven - my mother was Mormon, and I've had my fill of that mentality. I also cannot trust a religion that will kill people who do not convert. I'm disturbed about the killing of Christians in northern Africa that occurred a few months ago simply because they refused to become Muslim.  America was founded on freedom and education. We call it tolerance now, but you are supposed to be free to be who and what you want to be so long as you don't infringe on the rights of others. 

The Attacks on 9/11 is what spring-boarded me into adulthood. I was 31 years old when it happened, but I hadn't totally grown up yet. I still had my blissful American ideology and naivety. The world shrank very quickly, and my outlook changed with it. 

So, I gave pause yesterday morning and reflected all of the people who needlessly gave their lives. I prayed for the families that are still healing. I said thank you to the men and women who risk their lives daily for my safety, and I held on to Ken quite a bit. He went to war during the First Gulf War and is still dying because of his service. I didn't know him when this happened, but he and many others like him fight for our freedom everyday.

When I felt I had paid my tribute, I tackled my job. Things are so crazy with work, and I'm angry that all of the work that was done over the summer was for nothing.  All of the best laid plans, policies and procedures have gone out the window, and I barely have time to eat let alone do my job fully and well.  

After 6 straight hours, I shut down my computer and walked away. I couldn't function anymore, and there was no way I could tackle tomorrow's to-do list. I went and finished the piece I was working on, and I love how it came out.

I decided that I'll create the final Letter and then finish both of them into ornaments at the same time. It'll be easier for me that way, and hopefully, they will turn out well.  

Ken wanted the alone time with me last night, so we went out on the back patio to enjoy a cocktail and a cigar. It's a great routine we have. We are able to relax, and it's time where we can talk and catch up on what's going on, work out things that need to be done, etc. There was a lot of lightening over the eastern ridge, and it was cool to watch while we talked.  I made Ken take a picture with me, and then I died laughing when I saw what he did.

Talk about the perfect way to end the day!! I laughed so hard when I looked at the picture. What a dork!! And he's all mine!

Saving the World

OK, I could NOT have said it better than my friend Brie did this morning.  This is how I feel - RIGHT NOW with my job and the Law School stuff.  It was perfectly said, so I stole it.  Thank you Brie for putting into words how I feel this morning.

Brie Wells

‎"No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for... for ten minutes" Mr. Incredible

I love the movie The Incredibles. Very fun and funny, in such a compelling way. I laughed out loud with a chuckle of recognition in Mr. Incredible saying "I just want it to stay saved."

That's a little bit like my relationship with me and wanting to keep it together. I just want to finally once and for all get my stuff in order, ya know? Get my workouts effective once and for all, meditate enough I will then gain clarity once and for all, get my posture perfect, or money handled once and for all. And the list goes on and on.

However, it doesn't work that way. The essence of life is is changeability and challenges, just when we thought our money was handled, stocks go down, or someone is laid off, just when we get into a rhythm in our jogging, our knees blow out. The attempt to make life static can get us in muddy waters.

The world ain't going to be saved, so we can stop trying to get it to tow the line and be perfect. Neither are we going to be perfect, so we can relax and breathe. We can practice mercy, compassion and joy at our foibles, inconsistencies, and downright stubbornness.

In the times when I pressed, I stop and breathe.

Shame on you, President Obama

Tomorrow, we Americans will celebrate Memorial Day.  This is a day that was set aside in order to honor those who gave their lives to give us our freedom.  

http://www.usmemorialday.org/backgrnd.html

I spent my day preparing everything for friends to come over for the traditional BBQ and kick-off of summer.  With Ken, our minds are always on our Veterans and our men and women in the military still serving, but we also remember to love each day and celebrate.  However, I know that there are many who do not understand the importance behind this day off from work which is why I linked the site to explain the history behind the Federal holiday.

Cartoons have been put into papers for years to remind people that this is a solemn holiday:

However, while I was wasting time on Facebook, I saw this posting:

IT'S A TRADITION FOR THE U.S. PRESIDENT TO LAY A WREATH IN ARLINGTON NATIONAL CEMETERY AT THE TOMB OF THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER ON MEMORIAL DAY. BUT IT WON'T HAPPEN THIS YEAR. THE PRESIDENT IS TAKING A VACATION TO CHICAGO!! WAY TO SHOW RESPECT TO THOSE WHO HAVE GIVEN THEIR LIFE TO PROTECT THIS NATION! IF YOU AGREE THIS IS WRONG......COPY AND POST IT TO YOUR FB PAGE (shame on you Mr. President)

I could not believe this!  I did not want to believe this.  There have been many things said about Barack Obama before and after he won his presidency, but this was too much for me.  Why would our President skip the annual trip to Arlington to go home for a visit with friends? This is war-time and our troops need to know that we remember the sacrifice that so many have given and some will still give.

So, I went to the Internet and was appalled to find that this was not a hoax or Obama-bashing. It was the truth - President Obama is heading home.

Fox News reported it with this headline:  

Stressed Out or Tone Deaf? Obama Chicago Vacation Raises Eyebrows

There is another blog, The Foundry, that talks about things from the right-wing stance:

This weekend, President Obama will skip Memorial Day services at Arlington National Cemetery, and instead he will take his family to Chicago for rest and relaxation. The gesture has rankled many on the right and caused the left to swing into full ‘defend Obama’ mode. However, the fact remains that during a time of war, it is extraordinary that the Commander in Chief of our Armed Forces would choose not to be at Arlington on this solemn occasion.

First, it must be said that the president is not skipping out on his official duties entirely. At the start of the weekend, the president will travel to Louisiana to survey the response to oil spill; only his second trip to the region since the disaster over a month ago. And on Monday, the president will deliver remarks at the Abraham Lincoln National Cemetery in Elwood, IL. In between these duties he will spend a “casual weekend with friends” and then fly home in time to make a White House tribute to Paul McCartney on Wednesday evening.

So what’s the big deal? As leftist columnist David Corn writes: “[D]oes it matter if Obama throws some leaves on a tomb?” Well, apparently to liberals, it does not matter and to Corn, even wondering why the president would miss the occasion in itself dishonors lost soldiers. Seriously. Somehow, wanting the president to appropriately honor the troops who paid the ultimate price is chalked up as “political ammo.”

This is too much for me.  After reading all of the information that was available, I went straight to the source - The White House.  What I found was a video on the President's Blog stating why Memorial Day is so different from other holidays.  It was eloquent and moving, but then I remembered that he's going to be "celebrating with friends" as well rather than honoring those who made it possible for him to be the President of the United States.

But, I found that while I was listening to Obama speak, I was not feeling better, but more angry about this situation.  I really want to believe that the man that was voted by the American people to be our President, to lead us and guide us and ensure our standing in the world was a good man despite my own personal misgivings and mistrust.  I have overlooked the lies that I read for myself in his books, I overlooked the lies that he told while campaigning for Office, and I held out hope that he would prove to be effective.

The only thing that I can say for sure is that Barack Obama is an effective speaker.  His words hold no value, but he sounds good speaking them.  

In order to be as fair as possible, times change and traditions change as well.  George W. Bush spent 2002 in Normandy, France in order to honor the fallen on D-Day.  At the time, I thought that even he should have stayed in Arlington, but the location of the honor had an impact on me, and I understood the symbolism behind it.  However, changing locations from Arlington to the National Cemetery in Illinois is suspicious to me.  Obama wants to go home for the holiday.  Should be no problem, except that he continues to show his deference for the American people with his actions while sweet-talking everyone with his words.

I can imagine the honor that the local people are feeling in Elwood, Illinois, but I would still be angry about his deviation from tradition even if he had decided to attend the festivities at the Riverside National Cemetery where my own grandfather is buried and where my dear husband will be buried when the cancer takes him.

No matter how I look at all of the information, and no matter how much I try to take everything with the proverbial grain of salt, I agree with the Facebook statement, Shame on you Mr. President.

Jordan discovers that English sucks

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDFQXxWIyvQ

For anyone who has gone through my American Lit class, you will remember the very first day of school.  I go over the syllabus, my classroom rules, and then I explain that English is the most screwed up language on the planet, so it's not your fault if you haven't done well prior to my class.

This was a very effective way to start the school year with my students.  Most of them believed me after a while, and despite numerous parent phone calls concerned over my statement about the English language, the students not only did well throughout the school year, but they actually learned American grammar, etc.  I always loved to use some of Gallgher's routine that I linked here.  It was effective while funny, and you actually learn how silly English really is.

So, this being said, I am working with Jordan, my 6-year-old on her homework that she forgot to finish yesterday.  Part of her assignment is a book report.  Yes, book reports must be done in Kindergarten.  That's another rant that I can make another time.

She and I finish reading the book together (Disney Digital Books are awesome! http://disneydigitalbooks.go.com/homepage.html)and then it's time for her to fill in her report.  As Jordan is copying down the title of the book she read, "Ariel's Dolphin Adventure," she asks me about the "ph" in Dolphin.

"Mama, why is is spelled D-O-L-P-H-I-N when is sounds like D-O-L-F-I-N?"

"Well, I'm sure there is a reason that "ph" was used rather than the "f" but the "f" sound is made when "ph" is put together.  Another example would be "phone."  Sorry, Toots!  You just have to learn the difference."

"Yes, but Mama, if it's spelled D-O-L-P-H-I-N, then it should be sounded to 'DOLP-H-IN.'" Jordan made the /p/ sound and the /h/ sounds separately.

I tried to reason with her over this, but she just didn't get it.  So I went with my 11th grade English class lecture, "English is a screwed up language."

Jordan's comment was simple and concise, "If they want me to spell dolphin but make it an /f/ sound, then they should just use an "f" instead of "ph."  Jeez!  Do I have to do everything in this world for it to work right?!"