Sometimes, I like to write positive notes to parents. I just wanted to let you know that I am so impressed with Taylor lately. She has really been trying and her grades are getting better and better. Her positive attitude and effort on a daily basis is always appreciated. She is by far my most improved student this trimester.
Kristy Croft
Talk about a wonderful feeling as Mama. Taylor's first report card this year wasn't that great, and her progress reports have left me feeling like I should be doing more. She wasn't turning in her work, her grades were low, and with Taylor - I'm always worried.
When I was married to her bio-dad, I was the one who went to work full-time. I had just learned I was pregnant with Jordan, but I returned to school to finish my degree because someone had to work and support our family. I spent two and a half years working full time and going to school to finish my credential, but it was completed and I have a 3.92 to show for it. However, what I learned was that their father wasn't taking the girls to school every day. I would get home from work, sign their report cards or papers from school and then get to cooking, cleaning, and getting the girls ready for bed. I was exhausted, but I failed miserably because I didn't know that my child couldn't read past beginning Kinder stage and that she couldn't do basic math.
I fought the school about retention in Kindergarten and again in 1st grade. I really had no clue. And then I left their father. At that point, I started making myself pay attention. I had missed so many signs of their abuse by him (mental and physical). I thought he was only being mean to me and that they were safe because they were his. I was so very wrong. Then, I actually saw how many absences they had from school. Taylor was in 2nd grade and Mandy was in Kindergarten. Even JA's oldest child, my former step-daughter had missed a ton of school. I was outraged, and then cornered and had to make a grave decision for my children on top of the already difficult choice of leaving their father when I did not have the money or support to do so. (Long story short: no family, few friends, and a Deputy who refused to arrest him since a battered wife did not have the right to self-defense so it was ruled "mutually combative" because at one point I got a hit in.)
I held Taylor back in 2nd grade. I could not put her back further due to State Laws, but the school would have an RSP specialist work with her in the classroom to help her catch up on what she was missing, and I knew what I had to do at home to get her back on schedule. Taylor, of course, was devastated that she was being held back and not moving on with her friends. On top of that, I had to switch her to a new school because of finances - I couldn't afford the transportation and after school care at the really good charter school, so I had to put her in the local school.
So many changes for a little girl, and she struggles so hard to be at her current grade level. I work with Taylor like I would one of my own students. She isn't clinically "learning disabled," she is just academically behind and has to catch up and learn new material at the same time. While her peers spent their entire Kinder year learning to read, write and basic math which gave them time to absorb it, she had to learn it quickly and has to work to retain the information. At the end of last year, 5th grade, I was so impressed that she had straight 4's on her report card. That means that she was completely at grade level in all subjects. Her State testing results were all "Proficient" which also showed she is at grade level which is far better than her "Far Below Basic" when she was in 2nd grade the first time. Taylor spends so much time working and studying, and she works consistently harder than her peers all of the time, and she will have to do so through college.
I spend so much time reminding her that this is what she has to go through, and while it is her parents' fault (I include myself because I should have taken more time to pay attention), she is stuck with the consequences. Taylor takes this challenge and does not shrink from it, but rather takes is by the horns and makes it work for her. She has the typical moments when she's just a kid, but then her progress reports remind her that she isn't working hard enough.
There was one small email that dragged out a huge story about Taylor. As much as I get frustrated with her for her pre-pubescent behavior, I am so proud of her and her accomplishments. She is my miracle child, and I love her more than she may ever know. Every seemlingly "small" victory in her education puts her so much further ahead of her peers. She knows what it is to work hard and never give up on her dreams. Taylor is looking ahead at college and trying to find the right job that fits her so she can be happy while working and self-sustaining.
Whew! I must be doing something right! ;)
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